The Daily Journal from Flat River, Missouri • A4

A4 Wednesday, July 25, 2018 Daily Journal 00 1 RECORDS OBITUARIES Madeline Doba PARK HILLS Madeline Doba, 78, Park Hills, passed away July 8, 2018, at home. She was born March 15, 1940, at Twapity Township near Charleston, Mo. Preceded in death by: Parents, James and Mamie (Harris) Fincher; one sister; six brothers. Survived by: Friend and former husband, Larry Doba; Children, Terry Widener, Paul (Judy) Ash, Skyla Schmidt, Lana (Mike) Kruse, Cathy (Bryan) Eaton, Keith (Desiree) Doba, Christy Doba, and close family friend, Jennifer Wisdom; 10 grandchildren; 12 great grandchildren; sisters, Aline (Mike) Stawizynski, Gwen (John) Shelley, and Agnes White; brothers, Jerry (Faye) Fincher and Wayne (Carol) Fincher; also survived by many nieces, nephews, other relatives and friends. She was a hairdresser for years and owner of Pat Company in Park Hills.

Memorial service, July 28, 2018 at Horton-Wampler Funeral Home at 11 a.m. to 1 p.m. with service starting at 1 p.m. with Chaplin Cody Alley offi ciating. In Lieu of owers, donation to St.

Jude or Shriners. Arrangements by Horton-Wampler Funeral Home. Lt. Commander Victor Osher, Jr. POPLAR BULFF Lt.

Commander Victor E. Os- her, 84, of Poplar Bluff passed away Tuesday, July 17, 2018, at Graham Hospital in Canton, Ill. Survivors include his three children; Christina Osher (Michael Reith) Victor Edward Osher III and Kelly (John) Koury; six grandchildren; four great-grandchildren; a sis- ter, Connie Howlett of Park Hills and a brother Danny Osher of Poplar Bluff Funeral Service with full military honors Wednesday, July 25 at Cotrell Funeral Home. Please visit cotrellfuneralservice.com to leave a condolence message and view full obituary. DEAR ABBY: My signifi-cant other fathered her two children and seemed dedicated to his family.

He worked hard to support and care for them. Then, al- most over- night, it all changed. My daughter is now a single (unemployed) mom with two little ones under 4. She needs help, and I need advice about how to best help her. It appears need to move in with us (an ar- rangement that will be stressful for all).

Life is a bowl of lemons, and I need a good recipe for lemonade. Help, please! READY TO PITCH IN DEAR READY: This would be my recipe: The first thing you adults should do is remind yourselves that this be forever only until your daughter is able to find a job, get back on her feet and the children are in day care. Repeat it to yourselves out loud when necessary, and it may help you re- tain your sanity when life becomes stressful. Next, help your daugh- ter ensure that the chil- father continues to provide financially for them. If he is resis- tant, an attorney may be able to help, and so can government agencies in every state.

And last, give the new additions to your house- hold all the love and understanding you can which I am sure you are already doing because you seem like a very nice person. This, too, will pass. DEAR ABBY: I like my stepsister, and when she stays with us, forced to share a room with her. The last time she was here I got so mad at her I pretended to send a text message on my cell and secretly took a picture of her as she got out of the shower. I knew it was wrong, but it seemed funny at the time.

I sent it to my boy- friend because he like her either, even though he thinks she has a I thought it would be a joke just between us, but he sent it to some of his friends, and now making the rounds. Luckily, she goes to a different school, so nobody has recognized her, but scared some- one will. give any- thing to take back what I did. What should I do? SCARED STEPSISTER DEAR SCARED STEPSISTER: You should be scared. What you did was shameful and dangerous.

Not only was it an invasion of privacy, it is also a crime distribution of a por- nographic image of a mi- nor. Now that photo is on the internet, you will not be able to take it back. Pray that no one in your family finds out, or you may be grounded, like, forever, and your boyfriend will be history. If the news does get back to your family, prepare yourself for a punish- ment like no other. DEAR ABBY: I have been married for 20 years and recently had an affair with a woman call I care very much about.

My marriage was already in the final stages of failure by the time we met. Over the last two weeks, I stayed at house on the nights I worked. Two days ago, without telling me, she went to talk to my wife to her side of the She believed ev- erything my wife said and broke up with me. Susan has now blocked my phone number and told me to leave her alone. Is it worth trying to reach out to her? Susan knew when I met her that I was married and continued seeing me.

I told her the wife and I were separating but living in the same house until the lease ends. She thinks I lied to her, which I never did. I was always honest with her. What do you think happened? DUMPED IN CALI- FORNIA DEAR DUMPED: It appears that your side of the story enough for Susan. She identified with whatever she was told and accepted it lock, stock and barrel.

Be- cause she mature enough to discuss it with you, she decided to cut and run instead. Lesson for you: Move out before you start dat- ing again. not going to be forever just until the lease ends. DEAR ABBY: My desk is situated right outside my office. Her el- derly father is in failing health, and while not unsympathetic, each day for 30 to 40 minutes she takes personal phone calls with his daytime caregiver.

The calls are always on her speaker- phone with her office door wide open. in a cubicle, so I have no door to close. Is there a polite way to encourage her to rectify this? NOT DEAF IN SEATTLE DEAR NOT DEAF: Yes. As tactfully as you can, ask your boss if she would mind if YOU close her door for the duration of those conversations because they distract you from doing your work. dear abby is written by abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips.

Contact dear abby at www. dearabby.com or P.O. Box 69440, los angeles, Ca 90069 DEAR ABBY DEAR ABBY HARRIETTE COLE DEAR DOCTOR: I have some dark chocolate every day and my (otherwise kind and loving) husband teases me for believing the news stories that chocolate is good for you. Please tell me that I fallen for a bunch of quack science! DEAR READER: We can certainly understand how the idea that choco- late off ers health benefi ts might spark a bit of skep- ticism. After all, when we hear about so-called superfoods, foods like kale, fi sh oil or green tea that tend to top the list.

The idea that something as delicious as chocolate might be anything more than an indulgence takes a bit of getting used to. And yet right a num- ber of studies have linked chocolate with a range of positive outcomes. The results of recent research suggest that chocolate im- proves memory and brain function, lowers blood pressure and cholesterol, can boost immunity and has a positive eff ect on mood. But before you unwrap a chocolate bar in celebra- tion, an important caveat. only dark choc- olate that confers these positive eff ects.

That is, chocolate with a minimum cacao concentration of 70 percent. because cacao is rich in chemical substances known as a- vanols, which have potent antioxidant properties. Studies have shown that avanols have a positive eff ect on connections between brain cells, off er protection from toxins and can shield the body from some of the damaging ef- fects of ammation. The catch here is that in its pure state, cacao is relentlessly bitter. the sugar and fat that get added during manufac- turing that give chocolate its sweetness and silky- smooth feel.

For many people, the high levels of cacao needed for choco- late to become potentially benefi cial render it unpal- atable. If a lover of dark chocolate, though, in luck. The results of two re- cent studies regarding dark chocolate, which were presented at the Experimental Biology 2018 annual meeting last April, back up many of the existing health claims about dark chocolate. (They also give you some recent data to use the next time you get teased for your chocolate-loving ways.) Researchers from Loma Linda University examined the brain scans of study participants be- fore and after they ate 48 grams 1.7 ounces of dark chocolate. In the post-chocolate scans, they saw increased activ- ity among certain immune cells in functions like T-cell activation, cellular immune response and in genes involved in neural signaling.

That translates to benefi cial eff ects on mood, memory, stress lev- els and ammation. As with all studies that have a fairly small sample size, the fi ndings here need fur- ther investigation to nail down the cause-and-ef- fect of what the research- ers saw. Meanwhile, when you do eat chocolate, be sure to go for 70 percent cacao or higher. Natural choc- olate has more avanols than Dutch process, which uses alkali to neutralize the acid found in cacao. This makes it tastier, but also lowers the avanol content.

And remember that despite all of its po- tential health benefi ts, chocolate is also delivering both fat and calories. Be sure to adjust your diet accordingly. ASK THE DOCTORS ELIZABETH KO AND EVE GLAZIER DEAR HARRIETTE: My brother is visiting from New York City and is staying with me in my apartment in Los Angeles for a week. We are very close and usually tell each other everything. In the past couple of months, he has been ask- ing me for money quite frequently.

They are not huge amounts, but still money that earned that now giving away. When I ask my brother what the for, he says for food and trans- portation, but I have a feeling he owes someone money and needs to pay it off Should I push my brother into telling me? in a Financial Pickle, Los Angeles DEAR IN A FINANCIAL PICKLE: It is OK for you to stop giving your brother money. Tell him that you feel uncomfortable doling out money to him regu- larly. He should be able to pay for his own food and transportation. You are happy to host him at your home, but you do not want to pay for his liveli- hood.

Add that if he is in trouble and needs to talk about it, you are all ears, but the constant money transfer must stop now. If you stop giving him cash, this may trigger your brother to be more forthcoming especially if there is a loan involved. Just be clear about how far you intend to go to help him. great to support your brother, but there has to be a limit, for his own good and for your wallet. DEAR HARRIETTE: One of my good friends growing up got engaged a couple of months ago.

The wedding is in August, and excited to attend. One thing that has been on my mind is whether be getting a plus-one with my invitation. I would love to have my girlfriend there with me, but my friend know her that well. I think awk- ward to bring up, but I would like to know. What is the proper etiquette about wedding invites? If he is one of my best friends, I get a plus-one? Plus-One Please, Baltimore DEAR PLUS-ONE PLEASE: Weddings are stressful for couples and families because they are so expensive and de- tailed.

One of the biggest stressors is the guest list. Each person invited costs hundreds of dollars to host. Obviously, not what your friend was thinking about when he invited you or anybody else. Chances are, he made a big guest list and whittled it down over time when getting prac- tical about managing ex- pectations and budget. That said, the old- school wisdom about a plus-one is that one should be off ered that in- vitation if one is married or engaged.

In world where many people are coupled but not mar- ried, the rules bend a bit. Still, the wedding couple can decide to invite a few single friends without plus-ones, especially if they are not in long-term, committed relationships. You can ask your friend if your girlfriend will be invited, but press him if the answer is no. Instead, ask who else among your mutual friends will be there so you know who you can spend time with. Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of dReaMleaPeRs, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams.

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